when I close my eyes
I feel this unbearable humming
it goes up my nostrils
and pierces right into my brain
the pain is unexpected yet peaceful
I can feel the vibrations of the bodies
it transfers onto the chairs
and they transfer it onto the
silence & numbness of the Earth.
but when you hold your legs up for a few seconds
the humming gets stronger & stronger
you vibrate
the chair starts to shift, jumping up and down
subtle, at first
then everyone notices it
everyone turns around
they see your chair jumping up and down
creating loud noises
of metal banging onto concrete
it gets louder & louder & louder
LOUDER
the people around you start screaming
they start screaming
“LOUDER, LOUDER, LOUDER.”
because now you are the only one who understands them
they now see, some for the first time
what is inside them
everything else around you
is still silent
the people outside wandering down the street as if nothing is happening
but you hold onto the chair,
your fingers start bleeding because the wood
cuts into your palms
still BANGING.
“LOUDER. LOUDER. LOUDER.”
you are trapped, you can see everyone watching you.
no one is helping you.
blood drips onto the concrete floor,
smeared up by the legs of the chair
and you don’t want help
your hands are now glued to the chair
you start gripping to it,
your own strength helping it to jump higher in the air
a few centimetres to the right
and a few to the left
your own space
of perpetual pain & peace
while everyone is watching you
but you cannot understand anymore---